HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!!

Happy birthday to me! Those aren’t words we often tell ourselves are they? Oh well, after experiencing what seemed like my unfair share of challenges in the past two years; the one thing I have learnt is that I’m the most important person in my life and I’ll never place any other human being before me.

As I celebrate the beginning of another year of my life, I’m most grateful to God for His blessings and seeing me through yet another tough year. I’m definitely forging forth as a much stronger woman. The past two years have definitely been my most challenging yet. I remember my greatest prayer as I began this year being to have peace, tranquility and harmony above all else in life. So, was my prayer answered?  Well, as much as I would have loved to have a definite answer, interestingly, I don’t have a yes or no answer to that question. This is one year that has taught me that peace isn’t the absence of challenges, but learning to live through them by faith; and realizing that a strong and beautiful sculpture can only be achieved through thorough sharpening with sharp tools, just like a beautiful and strong clay pot has to be passed through a hot kiln to achieve perfection.

Some of the greatest lessons I can say I’ll take with me to the next year are first to love me more and let go of toxins. I’ve always been that person who sacrifices their happiness for that of others, but never again. People don’t always appreciate what you do and the least you can do is get rid of those who make you feel like garbage, those carcinogens that will kill you slowly and silently on the inside and by the time you know, you’re literally as good as dead. This has become cliché but your life really isn’t a rehearsal; like seriously you only live once and if you’ll live surrounded by negative energy then you’re better off dead than alive. Truth be told, the safest place in this life is actually the graveyard. Those guys are literally already gone and those we really need to be most scared of are the living. God is the perfect companion for us in our life journey and He surely does place us in the right hands when we trust and let Him do so.

Secondly, I’ve learnt I’d rather have one contact in my phonebook that I’m sure I can fully rely on that 1,000 contacts who will all be out of reach when they know I need their support. It’s better to have one person who can literally die for you than a million who will walk away one after the other when you need them most then at the end you realize you’re alone yet you’re surrounded by “friends”. One questions I asked myself this year was how come some people never really call or make any form of contact unless I do so and even afterwards they still never call back? Well guess what? The answer is obvious but most often than not we ignore the writing on the wall. You’re not really that important to them, if I must tell you the harsh reality. The most interesting part of it all is the fact that most of those we think are friends are actually acquaintances. Honestly, your list of friends is much shorter than you think. Yes, I said it; we most often than not trust people until challenges and time try those friendships and relationships, then we realize we were wrong all along. Truth is, I’d rather share the most important days and events of my life alone, than surrounded by a million people who are just there for the free ride and drinks at the party. If you’re rich today, wait for the day you God-forbid become poor then see who still stands beside you with the same love, pride, trust and faith they had in you before; and if you’re poor or just what society would term as average, wait till the mullah start flowing and you’ll be surprised by the number of new friends you’ll make and even “older friends” reaching out to you. Unfortunately we most often forget those who faithfully stood by us throughout the journey, that’s the unfortunate nature of human beings.

Thirdly, I’ve realized I have to trust me more, forgive myself more and let go what’s beyond me. Sometimes we’re too hard on ourselves over things we honestly have no control over. Ladies, well most ladies, as much as we have caring and nurturing hearts; sometimes we have and need to let go in order to move forward. For any man reading this, one thing you should know about women is the fact that we never really let go until we have literally come to a brick wall, hit it hard severally, gotten wounded and finally painfully realized it’s a dead end.

You’re the most important thing and person in this life and the day you realize the need to place yourself first, will probably be when you’ll really be the happiest. Most may call it selfishness but really as long as no one is suffering in the process and you’re doing what you feel is right for you, then it’s okey. Be most generous to yourself because unfortunately sometimes you end up being the victim of your own generosity.

We all have a God-determined destiny and as long as we continue trusting the one who created us, then all else will fall in place. Not at our own time, but in His. Happy new year everyone!!!