Happy birthday to me! Those aren’t
words we often tell ourselves are they? Oh well, after experiencing what seemed
like my unfair share of challenges in the past two years; the one thing I have
learnt is that I’m the most important person in my life and I’ll never place
any other human being before me.
As
I celebrate the beginning of another year of my life, I’m most grateful to God
for His blessings and seeing me through yet another tough year. I’m definitely
forging forth as a much stronger woman. The past two years have definitely been
my most challenging yet. I remember my greatest prayer as I began this year
being to have peace, tranquility and harmony above all else in life. So, was my
prayer answered? Well, as much as I
would have loved to have a definite answer, interestingly, I don’t have a yes or
no answer to that question. This is one year that has taught me that peace
isn’t the absence of challenges, but learning to live through them by faith;
and realizing that a strong and beautiful sculpture can only be achieved
through thorough sharpening with sharp tools, just like a beautiful and strong
clay pot has to be passed through a hot kiln to achieve perfection.
Some of the
greatest lessons I can say I’ll take with me to the next year are first to love
me more and let go of toxins. I’ve always been that person who sacrifices their
happiness for that of others, but never again. People don’t always appreciate
what you do and the least you can do is get rid of those who make you feel like
garbage, those carcinogens that will kill you slowly and silently on the inside
and by the time you know, you’re literally as good as dead. This has become
cliché but your life really isn’t a rehearsal; like seriously you only live
once and if you’ll live surrounded by negative energy then you’re better off
dead than alive. Truth be told, the safest place in this life is actually the
graveyard. Those guys are literally already gone and those we really need to be
most scared of are the living. God is the perfect companion for us in our life
journey and He surely does place us in the right hands when we trust and let
Him do so.
Secondly,
I’ve learnt I’d rather have one contact in my phonebook that I’m sure I can
fully rely on that 1,000 contacts who will all be out of reach when they know I
need their support. It’s better to have one person who can literally die for
you than a million who will walk away one after the other when you need them
most then at the end you realize you’re alone yet you’re surrounded by
“friends”. One questions I asked myself this year was how come some people
never really call or make any form of contact unless I do so and even
afterwards they still never call back? Well guess what? The answer is obvious
but most often than not we ignore the writing on the wall. You’re not really
that important to them, if I must tell you the harsh reality. The most
interesting part of it all is the fact that most of those we think are friends
are actually acquaintances. Honestly, your list of friends is much shorter than
you think. Yes, I said it; we most often than not trust people until challenges
and time try those friendships and relationships, then we realize we were wrong
all along. Truth is, I’d rather share the most important days and events of my
life alone, than surrounded by a million people who are just there for the free
ride and drinks at the party. If you’re rich today, wait for the day you
God-forbid become poor then see who still stands beside you with the same love,
pride, trust and faith they had in you before; and if you’re poor or just what
society would term as average, wait till the mullah start flowing and you’ll be
surprised by the number of new friends you’ll make and even “older friends”
reaching out to you. Unfortunately we most often forget those who faithfully
stood by us throughout the journey, that’s the unfortunate nature of human
beings.
Thirdly, I’ve
realized I have to trust me more, forgive myself more and let go what’s beyond
me. Sometimes we’re too hard on ourselves over things we honestly have no
control over. Ladies, well most ladies, as much as we have caring and nurturing
hearts; sometimes we have and need to let go in order to move forward. For any
man reading this, one thing you should know about women is the fact that we
never really let go until we have literally come to a brick wall, hit it hard
severally, gotten wounded and finally painfully realized it’s a dead end.
You’re the
most important thing and person in this life and the day you realize the need
to place yourself first, will probably be when you’ll really be the happiest.
Most may call it selfishness but really as long as no one is suffering in the
process and you’re doing what you feel is right for you, then it’s okey. Be
most generous to yourself because unfortunately sometimes you end up being the
victim of your own generosity.
We all have a
God-determined destiny and as long as we continue trusting the one who created
us, then all else will fall in place. Not at our own time, but in His. Happy
new year everyone!!!
